Tuesday, 24 February 2009

How not to make someone redundant!

My housemate is finding out today whether he is being made redundant or not. He and thirty other employees got a letter yesterday stating that 14 members of staff would be let go and there job was at risk. They have a staff of about 60 he has told me so basically 30 got put at risk yesterday and there having meetings all day today to see who is getting the boot.

He emailed me a few minutes ago to tell me the latest

"well according to someone whos alreayd been in a meeting it was explained that theres 3 people and the cad manager whos to stay...theres only 6 of us so thats 2 to go...also that document handling will be done with cad from now so that means i might have a small chance of staying as the currrent print monkey will get the boot and i know how to use everything as i was the print monkey before that...

theres a possibility...im still sh*tting it though"

I prefer the way they have been doing it in my job. THey call you into a meeting at 9am tell you your gone, pack your stuff, leave that day with a months pay then you get your redundancy after that.

Imagine having to sit there waiting to see if your being made redundant. Ridiculous, im sure there whole office hasn't done any work today. Just sitting around waiting to see who gets the chop. Bad for morale, apparently if you sack people on a Friday they cause less of a scene too.

I wished my friend good luck and told him id give him 20 quid for his 40 inch HD tv if he was stuck for money, im too nice for my own good.

Further update from the man himself, this is the first of three redundancy meetings he will be having over the next three weeks. I told him to claim the boss would save his job if my mate sucked his cock and then demand to paid for the next 5 years as an outside consultant who never had to come to work and if his boss refused, I instructed my friend to headbutt the wall until his head exploded and say his boss attacked him.


Bring Out The Gimp said...

hoorah my life as explained above.

if i keep my job ill eat my own feet

Maxi Cane said...

This is happening everywhere. A friend of mine was hired for a new job on a Friday, due to start on Monday.
The company filed for bankruptcy on the Tuesday.


Toners said...

That's bleeding mental mate. Morale would be through the floor.

Anonymous said...

Wow its like an episode of big brother office style. Who will be voted off tonight? I'd probably just assume it was me and start fucking shit up. Hey and then if I wasn't originally supposed to get the boot they would axe me instead. I'd have saved someone! I'm a fuckin saint!!

Bring Out The Gimp said...

actually i think you said 20 quid didnt you? lol

theres no way your having my tv for that


PaddyInEngland said...

@Bring Out The Gimp: Wait till you have no pay cheque, I will offer you 10.

Bring Out The Gimp said...

not my own as in just mine, i meant im out of mummy dearest's

and no, not even a tenner

Quickroute said...

Raise his rent and you'll have that TV in jig time